So I work at a video game store in a mall and across the hall from us is this really nice suit shop. One day one of the guys came in an asked if they could use our microwave (the store they used to go to closed down) and we bargined for use of their bathroom in return since the mall bathrooms are like a 5 min trek.
So for like three months now we just have these men in really nice suits come in and talk while using our microwave and teach them about nerdy shit? Then I, the goblin king in various shitty tee shirts and paint stained pants, walk into their super expensive store and just get greeted with “Yo dude what’s good?” and talk about the pains of steaming silken dress shirts properly and it’s my favorite business interaction every day
A new jewelry store opened up right next to our store and when I used the bathroom today we were talking about it. I hate it on principle (they flooded our systems closet during building) and immediately both Suit Guys™ working went on mini rants. “Their suits are baggy as hell, I wouldn’t trust them to sell me a $9,000 ring when they can’t get a fitted jacket. They look so unprofessional, ” and “I saw one of the dude’s wearing a teal shirt. It’s fall, and you go with teal? At least get a color to match your store if you’re gonna ignore the seasons like that, Christ, but teal is awful.”
I told the guys (Teal Man is Spencer and Baggy-Suits Guy is Arnold) that this post got this popular and they’re both super excited.
Arnold: “Sweet, we’re internet famous!”
Spencer: “131,000?!”
Arnold: “What are notes? What does that mean, is that good?”
Arnold bargined that if it gets more notes, I can A: post a pic of them crouching with peace signs in front of the Notorious Jewelry Store and B: post the video of him long boarding down to Macy’s and back lmaoooo
Since I can’t post a video as a comment, I made it into gifs instead lol. Spencer and Arnold, the OG suit shop Bois, have both left to persue different dreams 👌👌 though we still have a damn fine relationship with the guys over there, so it all works out! Their shop is moving soon, so alas, the legacy may be coming to a close.
So I work at a video game store in a mall and across the hall from us is this really nice suit shop. One day one of the guys came in an asked if they could use our microwave (the store they used to go to closed down) and we bargined for use of their bathroom in return since the mall bathrooms are like a 5 min trek.
So for like three months now we just have these men in really nice suits come in and talk while using our microwave and teach them about nerdy shit? Then I, the goblin king in various shitty tee shirts and paint stained pants, walk into their super expensive store and just get greeted with “Yo dude what’s good?” and talk about the pains of steaming silken dress shirts properly and it’s my favorite business interaction every day
A new jewelry store opened up right next to our store and when I used the bathroom today we were talking about it. I hate it on principle (they flooded our systems closet during building) and immediately both Suit Guys™ working went on mini rants. “Their suits are baggy as hell, I wouldn’t trust them to sell me a $9,000 ring when they can’t get a fitted jacket. They look so unprofessional, ” and “I saw one of the dude’s wearing a teal shirt. It’s fall, and you go with teal? At least get a color to match your store if you’re gonna ignore the seasons like that, Christ, but teal is awful.”
I told the guys (Teal Man is Spencer and Baggy-Suits Guy is Arnold) that this post got this popular and they’re both super excited.
Arnold: “Sweet, we’re internet famous!”
Spencer: “131,000?!”
Arnold: “What are notes? What does that mean, is that good?”
Arnold bargined that if it gets more notes, I can A: post a pic of them crouching with peace signs in front of the Notorious Jewelry Store and B: post the video of him long boarding down to Macy’s and back lmaoooo
Cellulite is a female secondary sex characteristic and should be celebrated as a rite of womanhood, not despised or eradicated.
it’s really a secondary sex characteristic?!
It is. It has to do with the way our bodies network fat. Female bodies create sort of a mesh network to support fat (female bodies are MUCH more hardy in times of stress) and it can present as delightfully lumpy. More than 90% of women have visible cellulite, but all women store fat in this manner.
why did no one tell me this?!
You know why
Spread this. I only just started to see mine and I started to freak out a bit. More people should/need to know about this
Here’s an illustration of the aforementioned difference in fat storage.
Men’s lattice pattern collagen threads holds subcutaneous fat in a way that, when the skin expands because of the fat storage, it expands evenly. Women’s “pockets” expand unevenly when we accumulate fat, creating that orange peel effect. Our storage pattern means we can healthily store more fat than men. Like a woman with 25% body fat is average, a man with 25% body fat is chubby. Because of that, like OP said, women are hardier in times of stress or famine. It’s also one of the reasons why our bodies can survive pregnancy, which is a massive energy demand on our system.
And there’s absolutely NO “treatment” for cellulite that will work. They are all bullshit designed to separate you from your hard-earned cash. It’s a secondary sex characteristic, it’s perfectly normal and it’s not going away no matter what you do. Like I’m very lean myself and I work out 5~6 times a week, and I still have cellulite. Someone giving a woman shit for having cellulite is akin to giving her shit for having skin. It’s just a mixture of misogyny and corporate greed.
Love your lumpy skin, ladies. It means you are a badass surviving machine shaped by millenia of evolution.
I did not know this, and I pride myself on knowing shit like this.
I’m a teenager, barely healthy weight (think 56kg/124lbs at 172cm/5′8, ribs visible kind of skinny), did Taekwondo for ten years of my life, work out an average 2 hours a week, walk a lot, etc.
Basically, I’m the traditional standard of ‘slim young woman’, and I STILL have cellulite around my nonexistent ass. It’ll happen. Scarlett Johannsen aka Black Widow has cellulite ffs.
The King has lost, and not even the combined efforts to Liverpool, Castlereagh, Sidmouth and Eldon can seem to make the King popular.
….is there a reason why the green bag is labelled with “Green Bag”? Does it have meaning, or did they just run out of labels?
The Green Bag was a legitimate thing. There were actually two of them and they contained all the evidence dirt Ministers had been compiling on Princess Caroline (her companions and habits, ‘testimony’ against her character, purloined letters, &c.) since the first time the Prince Regent floated the idea of divorcing her many years earlier. It was a very dramatic and pivotal moment when Lord Castlereagh brought the Green Bags and placed them on the baize tables of the House of Lords to begin proceedings against her during her ‘Trial’ in 1820. Consequently, they featured heavily in popular imagination – and indeed popular prints and literature – of the time as a symbol of the Government’s malice and ill-will towards her.
So, I noticed that I have developed an appreciation of green. Generally I would have said it was my least favourite colour (I have a phobia of something green) and yet………I can’t stop working with it!!! I’m going to blame this phenomenon on a fairly recent obsession with teal; I think where blue meets green is so pretty and it’s allowed me to enjoy shades that I previously would have dismissed or found unappealing.
When you die, you appear in a cinema with a number of other people who look like you. You find out that they are your previous reincarnations, and soon you all begin watching your next life on the big screen.
too much
My previous incarnations throwing popcorn at the screen and booing: thisbitch is fucking stupid!!!
This is timely, because I literally just was working on a friend’s resume who does commissions on tumblr, and I wrote it like this:
Freelance Artist • Created custom artwork for a variety of domestic and international clients. • Communicated effectively with customers in order to facilitate and execute their visions according to their individual needs. • Invoiced and processed payments via PayPal processing service. • Met deadlines, sustained a high level of customer satisfaction, and cultivated a database of clients. • Used social media to find and connect with customers.
Never underestimate the work that you’re doing!
Oh, yes, my friends. The earlier you learn to sell yourself with unmitigated bullshit, the better off you’ll be.
FantasyBoudicca 