ogkingsmanhartwin:

so @hellahartwin sent me the following prompt “For my prompt I challenge you to take one of these angsty sentence starters and somehow make it fluffy instead.” 

I chose “Is there someone else?” 

————–

“Are you sure we should be doin’ this?” Ryan asked quietly as he tap his foot against the floor repeatedly, looking nervous. “I mean… are we really sure… maybe we should just ask that old bastard if there’s someone else?” 

“Mate, askin’ ain’t gonna get us anywhere. We ‘afta do this for Eggsy,” Jamal insisted. “This git is doin’ somethin’ shady, and if he ain’t lovin’ it up at home, then he’s probably gettin’ it elsewhere and it’s our job to make sure Eggsy ain’t dating a piece of shit.” 

Ryan sighed but nodded, finally getting out of the car. “If we’re wrong Eggsy’s gonna fuckin’ kill us.” 

“He’s in fuckin’ Scotland, mate, he ain’t ever gonna find out, calm down,” Jamal said with a wink, finally opening the door of his car. “We gon’ be quick. Harry won’t even know we’re here.” 

Ryan didn’t seem convinced, but at the mention of the man’s name, he seemed to toughen up. When Jamal and Ryan had first heard that Eggsy was dating again, they had been a little suspicious, because their friend had just broken up with his princess, and they knew Eggsy; he didn’t get over people easily. 

They had grown even more suspicious when they had found out that Eggsy was dating the man that had changed his life for the better – and whom everyone had assumed to be dead. 

They hadn’t asked if the man was forcing him into anything as a way of showing his gratitude, mostly because they knew Eggsy would have already shown the man a lesson had that been the case, but they couldn’t deny the thought had crossed their mind so when they had met Harry Hart, they had not been exactly thrilled. 

They hadn’t showed it, however, knowing how important the man seemed to be to Eggsy. They had played nice, and the posh git had been as charming as they came; all proper smoothness, gentle smiles, and perfectly placed touches to keep Eggsy grinning like a loon for the entirety of the evening. 

So, in short, they had hated his guts because he had seemed a little too perfect, a little too trained, and they weren’t sure if the man was really in it for the right reasons. The fact that he had abruptly left that first meeting without explanation had also not helped matters much. 

What was really bugging the two, however, was the fact that it kept fucking happening. 

Every time they saw the man, something came up. It ranged from abruptly leaving Eggsy with them to attend to his “business” every so often, to seemingly random business trips that didn’t always make sense, to hushed phone conversations in his and Eggsy’s home – away from prying ears – to the man keeping an overtly careful eye on his phone to that one time where they had seen a pretty obvious lipstick mark on his shirt (a shirt that had conveniently disappeared from the man’s closet). 

They had tried to excuse all of his bizarre behavior for a few months, mostly out of respect to Eggsy, but the shit kept piling up and none of it made sense. What had really broken the last straw, however, had been finding Harry talking to a bald man in his study, the two jumping away from each other when Jamal had cleared his throat. They had had their backs turned away from the door, so Jamal had not been able to see what they were doing, but since then he had completely lost all trust in Harry Hart and he was almost 100% sure that the man was cheating on his best mate. 

And this bullshit would not fly with him. Ever. 

Hence why they had been following Harry all day. Eggsy had left for scotland less than twenty four hours ago, but Harry had called Jamal to ask him to dog-sit for them as an “unscheduled business meeting” had come up and he had to fly out. Jamal had agreed of course, and had promptly called Ryan and had had the young man meet him so they could follow the git. 

Jamal was absolutely certain they were going to catch the man today, considering that, instead of going to the airport, the man had driven out to Sussex and had gone into a mansion not ten minutes ago. 

“Business trip my ass,” Jamal said under his breath as they broke into the house, feeling thankful for the rather hefty training he had had when he had been in the marines with Eggsy.  

Once inside the house, they did not even need to wonder where Harry was, for the grunting noises coming from the basement were enough to catch the attention of them both. They all but ran downstairs, phones in hand to get enough evidence to show Eggsy. 

What they found, however, left them both frozen on the spot. 

For starters Eggsy was there, tied to the chair and with a bruised eye, but otherwise looking fine. And, instead of finding the bald man or another random chick or asshat fucking Harry, they found Harry beating the living shit out of a good fifteen different people. 

The man moved around the room like it was nothing, blocking hits with his arms or his umbrella while delivering blow after perfect blow. He skidded to his knees once one of his assailants pulled out a weapon, flinging out his hand to grab the man by the knee, using him as his personal pole to bring himself back up to a standing position while forcing the man’s knee to give in. 

He brought the man into a headlock, pulling out a weapon and pointing it directly to the man’s skull. 

“You blithering idiots have fifteen seconds to give me the code or your precious employer won’t be around to pay you,” Harry said pleasantly to the three men that were still somewhat standing. 

Harry hadn’t even broken into a sweat yet. 

“Wait, we don’t-”

Before the man could say much else Harry fired one shot, bringing his gun up and firing three more to eliminate the three standing men. “God, what a mess.” Harry sighed as he walked towards Eggsy, both still unaware of the frozen figures of Jamal and Ryan standing by the darkened doorway. “I am aware you wanted them alive, Merlin. I am also aware you already had the code and that that idiot wasn’t actually their boss. He was useless to us.” Harry reached pulled out and pulled out a knife as he talked seemingly to the air, releasing the young man from the rope’s tight hold. 

“You know, I could have gotten out of this one by myself,” Eggsy said amused. 

“Yes, I know. I didn’t want to stay home and stress about your return. JB gets most unhappy when Merlin starts screaming at me for being inpatient,” Harry said easily, almost carelessly, as if he hadn’t just murdered a room full of people to get his lover back safely. 

Eggsy grinned at the man, standing up to collect a much needed kiss. Harry indulged him, pulling him close as he all but devoured the younger man’s mouth, bringing his hands down to grip at Eggsy’s pert behind. 

Eggsy moaned softly, moving back ever so slightly to whisper “Merlin, mate, fuck off. Just turn off the camera. I wanna suck Harry off.” 

Harry chuckled. “Careful, Eggsy. If we push him too far, he’ll poison us tonight. Remember he and Lancelot are coming over for dinner.” 

Eggsy rolled his eyes. “Merlin would never murder you, Arthur, because that would mean he has to deal with paperwork all by himself.” 

“What the fuck,” Jamal heard himself whisper, too surprised to even notice he had said that out loud. 

Harry and Eggsy both turned then, Eggsy looking surprised and Harry looking calm, a gun already in his hand. His eyes landed on Jamal and he raised a single brow, his weapon not moving an inch. 

“Jamal? Ryan? What the fuck are you two doin’ here?” Eggsy asked, looking scandalized. 

“Oh  my god you just murdered all these people,” Ryan said as he took in the state of the room and then looked back at Harry, who still hadn’t put his gun down. 

“Yes, I did,” Harry said as he took a step forward, half hiding Eggsy with his own body. “But I can assure you, Ryan, they were not particularly nice people.” 

“Who the fuck are you? Why.. How… I thought you said he was a fucking tailor, Eggsy!” Jamal said his eyes trained on the gun. 

Eggsy gaped. “Mate, why the fuck are you two here?!” 

“We was followin’ him!” Ryan explained quickly as he took a step back when Harry took another step forward. 

“Why the fuck where you followin’ Harry?” Eggsy asked, his surprise now tinged with anger. 

“Mate we thought he was cheatin’ on ya! I mean the weird business trips, the hush hush phone calls, the lipstick on his shirt-”

Eggsy frowned “lipstick-”

“Two weeks ago, we went for dinner and he met us at the restaurant late and he had lipstick on his collar,” Ryan explained quietly, not meeting Harry’s gaze – or gun – to avoid squeaking. 

Eggsy chuckled, a hint of realization in his eyes. “Yeah, Harry had a mission that day. The lady got a bit over excited, but we got the information we needed.” 

Harry shuddered elegantly. “Nasty piece of work, she was,” he said, mostly to Eggsy. 

“And what about the bald man?” 

“Merlin? What about him?” Eggsy said, suddenly moving to the side to pick up a gasoline jug. He walked back to the bodies and sprayed them all with the liquid, not looking back at his friends’ horrified expressions. 

Harry reached the two then, grabbing them by the arm as he walked them out of the basement and up the stairs, Eggsy following a few seconds after. 

Once outside, Eggsy smiled at them, clicking something on his watch that made the whole house blow up in flames. Both Jamal and Ryan jumped backwards, a scream stuck in their throats. 

Harry smiled softly, finally putting his weapon away. “Well, I must say I am impressed you managed to follow me. I was obviously compromised, as I had a pressing matter in my head, but not many manage to do that. Congratulations.” 

Jamal wasn’t sure whether the man was taking the piss or not. “You still haven’t told us who the fuck you are,” he pointed out, putting on a bravado he didn’t actually feel. 

Harry was clicking something on his watch. “I am Harry Hart – head of an international spy organization, and Eggsy is my best agent. As for the bald man… that’s Merlin, my right hand man,” Harry said pleasantly, before raising his hand, the watch pointed directly at Jamal. “Now, I do apologize, but I can’t let you go knowing this much about our jobs. I do commend you both for your loyalty towards Eggsy,” Harry said with a final smile before something hit Jamal’s throat, and the world went black. 

Eggsy watched as his two best friends fell to the ground and he sighed. “Honestly, the second time in less than six months, how the fuck do they pick up on it so fast?” 

“Well, I’ve been taking more missions than usual,” Harry said as he waited for the Kingsman cab to pick them up. “Also, they’re keenly observant. Perhaps… if we, heaven forbid, get another opening, we can nominate them.” 

Eggsy grinned, giving his fiance a chaste peck on the lips. “I think they’d like that.” 

Harry hummed. “Honestly, I would do it right now, if only to avoid having them think I would ever set my eyes on someone else.” 

Eggsy chuckled. “It’s alright, babe. They’re just overprotective gits who don’t know jack shit. ‘Sides, I know exactly who you go to bed with every night, and that’s all that matters,” Eggsy said with another suggestive kiss, before finally pulling away to help Dagonet get his friends into the black car to take them back to their home.